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Students talk about the classes

  • “I thought self-defense was just about dealing with creepy random guys. But really, I had a problem getting my point across in everyday life. Now I know what to do.”

  • “I used to be so passive in what I allowed people to say to me. My kindness was mistaken for weakness, but no more.”

  • “This experience has been the best of my lifetime. It’s given me a foundation for my healing process…. I feel empowered and courageous. My life will never be the same.”

  • “I've been thinking about what I really need from the relationships — including friends and family — in my life, and I've felt much more able to state those needs plainly. I don't have to be quiet and nod when someone tells me to smile or tries to take up my space on public transit. I'm also going to be a lot more confident and relaxed the next time I go on a date or have a sexual partner, since I know I'll be able to get out of a tough situation if something goes [wrong],”

  • “I learned to put myself first and stand up for myself. I’ve learned to set limits and not adjust them. My safety comes first, not someone else’s feelings. I’ve learned not to make excuses for someone else’s behavior and to be aware of when others are using excuses to get to me.”

  • “It’s taken me a long time to really internalize what it means to have spent all my life trying not to get in the way. I realize now how important it is for me to really take up space.”​

Students talk about the book

  • “For 14 years, my mind blamed me for the assault. I knew it wasn’t my fault, but the voice in my mind kept telling me I should have fought, I should have run. And even though not fighting saved my life, the voice was relentless. Counseling and doctors did nothing. I learned to live with the voice, until I used this book. The experience was life-changing, and the voice was gone! It hasn’t come back.”

  • “The most powerful thing that came to me as a result of this workbook was the wonderful feeling of my assault being real. By putting it in writing, in the book, I broke the silence. I no longer held it in… I wrote it out.”

  • “Doing this workbook opened a lot of old wounds around an abusive relationship I was in, but I’m grateful for that. It helped me forgive myself and take steps to ensure I’m never in that situation again. All I can really say is thank you for this experience.”

  • “A year ago, I wasn’t able to stay grounded and push back when my boundaries were crossed, but working with this book has helped me fight my socialization to be ‘nice’ and to advocate for myself. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable and scary, but every time I practice being assertive, I know it will get easier.”

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